It’s 2009, not 1952

So Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston have ended their engagement. I just want to say I wish that family all the best and that whatever they do, it’s what’s right for the child, and for the quality of life for everyone involved. With that said, I can’t help but fight the urge to let a big “I told you so” spill forth from my mouth. The Palin matriarch fought night and day to convince the American public that her family was above any other family in taking the moral high ground and that her young teenaged daughter’s decision was one that she came to alone due to the excellent upbringing they provided her. Please give me a moment to lower my raised eyebrow.

First of all, if you remember, the Palin family was largely applauded for their handling of this pregnancy by people who are out of touch with the realities of teenage pregnancy. Personally I am pro-life (however, I do vote pro-choice) so I was glad to know that she wouldn’t be aborting. Yet at the same time, I was shocked by the level of support thrown her way with very little regard as to how she came to be in the family way. People like Bill O’Reilly who had railed against teenage pregnancy in other high-profile cases like Jamie Lynn Spears were suddenly singing a different tune. On one hand, teenagers who get pregnant are irresponsible, their parents are failures, and the sky is falling. However when you belong to a Conservative family involved in Politics with a folksy accent that’s out there working for Middle America, pro-life and gun-toting, well that’s a different story! You were just being young and carefree and well, mistakes happen. Considering your excellent upbringing you will come to the conclusion all by your pretty little self (oh Bless Your Heart!) that you should get married at 17 to the 18 year old, high school student, father of your child. When I woke up this morning, I am almost certain that my calendar said 2009.

I find it hard to believe that Bristol and Levi were not pushed to get married in the first place. I’m not judging, and honestly I wasn’t a fly on that wall, but I just can’t believe that in 2009 intelligent and informed young teens would decide that marriage is the next logical step. While having children out of wedlock is certainly never the ideal situation, I am pretty sure that forced marriages, irreconcilable differences, and a divorce is possibly worse. I know that I am not the same woman that I was when I was 17, and I don’t think your current circumstances should ever determine your future possibilities. So I don’t think that Bristol had to define her future simply due to her present position as a teenage mother.

Teenage pregnancy is something that has ALWAYS been an issue, however our society has decided to stigmatize it and sweep it under the rug. We love to point and laugh at all the minorities who are pregnant and we love to mock how many minorities are on WIC and welfare, but we rarely use that same accusatory finger on our more melanin challenged counterparts. Well, Mr. O’Reilly did take Jaime Lynn Spears to task, but he pretty much likened her to “trailer trash” and almost separate of the rest of the white population. Maybe the Palin baby will force mainstream America to take a different look at how to approach this issue. Teaching abstinence alone in schools is not effective. Sex and sexuality are natural human responses. Teaching kids to “just fight it” as opposed to how to deal with it responsibly clearly does not work. Here is a young woman who grew up in home in which her mother was clearly handling the business and producing brother after sister after brother, yet she’s being taught that the feelings she’s feeling should be suppressed and put on hold for years until she’s married. Now I will tell my children I think it is best that they wait until marriage, but at the same time, I will equip them with the knowledge necessary if they are unable to handle that pressure. I will not be a hypocrite and fail to teach my children how to be safe and responsible.

Perhaps now we’ll stop blaming it on the music, and on the parents who let their children go to the movies in the big dark movie theatre, and on the schools who showed their students how to use a condom. Perhaps now we’ll stop being so snide and rude to those we don’t like when they get pregnant, while saving our sympathy for those that we do. Perhaps now we’ll tackle the issue head on and come up with real solutions on how to properly educate our youth, and how to better respond when the “mistakes” do happen. Perhaps we need to spend more time educating parents on birth control and how to talk to their children about it. To do that though, we’ll have to teach our parents how to talk to their children to begin with. That’s always been a problem. It saddens me that it may take a high-profile non-minority family for this change to happen, but if that’s what it takes, then I’ll gladly do my part.

Jennifer Garrett

http://jgrunsthecity.com

http://twitter.com/JGRunsTheCity

“Running For Their Lives”

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